Birthdays

Mom turned 85 last month.  At this point, she's outlived everyone in her family except for her grandpa, who made 86.  They're generally not a long-lived bunch, but somehow, she's beaten the family odds.  

This, of course, called for a celebration!  Dad ordered her a wonderful cake.  I wasn't sure how this would go over since Mom has refused to eat cake for months now - but it was lemon and buttercream and I cut her a very small slice.  To my surprise, she ate it all and asked for a second, bigger piece!

 

It was a great party.  We used the private dining room at the home.  No decorations, but for our smiles and Mom's lipstick.  While we were waiting for people to arrive, she asked to be taken back to her room.  "Back to her room" is usually a very long and involved process, but I thought it was better than asking her to sit still and wait, so I wheeled her back.  She wanted to brush her hair and put on lipstick and  it was actually worth the trip.  She looked beautiful!

The family was all there - John and Mary made the trip down for the occasion, Jerry and Matt came from their respective jobs, and James & Dennis and Andy were there via FaceTime from New York and Atlanta, respectively.  And of course, Dad and I rounded out the gathering. 

  

We weren't fancy.  Jerry found a little stuffed friend for Mom and replaced her "gimmie" hat that had been taken from her room (or left somewhere or something).  John and Mary gave her beautiful roses and Matt came up with a lap desk.  After about half an hour, I could tell she was getting tired, so everyone said goodbye and I took her back to her room so she could take a nap.  It was a lovely celebration, but it sure did wear her out.  Dad too - he went home to take his own nap.

The brothers and I, however, hadn't had lunch yet, so we went to a restaurant nearby and had lunch. We love to get together and have dinner or lunch when someone's in town.  Usually it's a local pizza place for giant pizza and pitchers of beer, but that day, we went for sandwiches and ribs.  I didn't feel like I needed to eat again until late the next day!

Mom gets regular visits from the out-of-towners.  John and Mary come down fairly often.  Andy's schedule doesn't allow for a lot of visits, but he does get down from time to time.  James and Dennis flew in for a long visit (5 days) in January.  She's gotten to see everyone in person in the space of a month! 

After she own birthday celebration, she decided she wanted to send birthday cards out this year.  I have a calendar of family and her friends, so I combed through the cards I have (that's a lot of cards) and picked out some to take to her.  She chose which cards went to whom, and started her year off with a card to a grandson.  I also brought an anniversary card (she and dad have been married 63 years this month) for her to sign.  I left the birthday cards there on her dresser for her to write in as she thought of it, but of course as soon as I left that day, she completely forgot about them.

I went back today and said okay - let's write some cards!  We have quite a few for February.  She started with the last one first because she knew what she wanted to say.  Sadly, those words seemed to vanish as she struggled to write them down.  I helped her with spelling and she read what she wrote over and over, but had trouble moving on.  At that point, I asked her if she'd like to tell me what she wanted to say and I would write the words for her - she smiled and nodded enthusiastically.  I finished the first card and had her sign.  Then the second card, I wrote, but when I asked her to sign, she said she couldn't... would I?  We did three more cards that way, then she was ready for a nap.  Luckily, all the March birthdays are at the end of the month, so she won't have to do that again for a while.

I'm glad she's doing it though.  As brief and somewhat stilted as they are, they could well be the last communication she has with any of those people.  And these are people who mean something to her, people she loves.  Good to get it down while she still remembers that.