Day Off

Brothers came to town yesterday.  We met at a local pizza place for an enormous pizza and beer.  This has become a regular thing for us when one of the out-of-town brothers comes to visit.  Having two of them this time was a bonus.  It's an opportunity to relax and talk about things that need to be discussed.

They were planning to have breakfast with Mom Friday and Saturday.   Friday's breakfast stretched into a couple of hours.  As they drove to Dad's house afterwards, they called.  Mom was quite aphasic today - incomplete sentences, incomplete thoughts.  Since I spend at least an hour with her every day, I know this is becoming the norm and don't think much about it anymore.  But it's been two weeks since THEY saw Mom and the difference to them is dramatic.  When they were here last, there were smiles and complete sentences made up of thoughts expressed.  It's a bit alarming how quickly she's gone down.  I thought that maybe last weekend she'd had a small stroke - not uncommon in her family - but now I don't think so.  I think it's just rapid progression.

"I don't know how you do it," has become a common refrain, and I heard it again today from my brother's mouth.  Honestly, I'm not sure how I do it either, but I am lucky in that I have support from my local brother M, and from my dad.  I talk to Dad nearly every day and try to update him on what's going on with Mom.  M goes to see her often, so she knows who he is and who I am, but is getting a bit fuzzy on who everyone else is.

Dad's improved tremendously.  He got his immobilizer off on Monday after 6 weeks of not being able to bend his leg.  His knees are weak and the focus of PT has now shifted to strengthening them.  He's still got his Angels coming in the morning to get him out of bed and at night to put him back into it, but he's pretty self-sufficient now.  M and I take turns bringing him lunch, but he's almost ready to do for himself in that department too.

Running back and forth between Mom and Dad has been rough.  I squeeze in my work hours where I can - sometimes working at 6am, sometimes working into the night.  In between I visit Mom, then Dad.  Occasionally it's quick but more often it's hours with Mom, including sitting with her while she's in the bathroom or making sure she eats something.  Dad's easier.  He's jolly and always ready to have a cup of tea and a natter.  

But it does wear on me.  I try to make the most of times when other people can visit Mom or Dad so I can just have a day to myself.  I do my job, then maybe work in the yard or take a nap, or just sit in front of the TV and veg out.  It's not much, but it's enough to face the next days of visitation, doctor appointments and coming up with new ways to engage Mom.

Bless the "Boys" for coming down, for visiting with Mom and Dad and giving me a chance to catch up on MY life, which is put on hold a lot these days.

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